This is my book concept. do you like it? plz be honest. i can take it….? horror/thriller?
Question by BrOoKy ChOoKy: This is my book idea. do you like it? plz be honest. i can take it….? horror/thriller?
Titles ? adrenaline island? Bounce? The alter? Suspician? Lost?
Joey is a 26 year old man who has to be on his plane to go to an critical interview. He misses his plane and is really pissed off. Then a strange man by the name of Desmond offers his ticket. Joey does not accept but Desmond talks him into it saying that he doesn’t need to have to go to his destination correct away and he has won the gold lotto so that is the least he can do. Desmond sais that the plain is boarding in 30minutes and he far better hurry. Joey thanks the man and sais thank you so much you just saved my job and that he cant repay him. He shakes hands and swaps tickets with the man. He now boards his new plane. But…. A thing wrong occurs with the plane a mysterious crash in the sea happens with only Joey surviving. Joey is now strapped to his chair with his seatbelt whilst the water is rising towards his head. Now Joey has to fight for his life to get out of the plane. He struggles with his belt and ultimately breaks it loose. He swims out side the plane in shark infested waters and looks for the nearest island. He makes it to an island named ____? Island that is not far away from the plane and makes his first step on a rock on the island. He is content he is alive and kisses and hugs this *lovely* rock. He looks around the island knowing it is deserted. The time is 3pm and the island is a misty grey. The rain begins to spit and Joey finds a tree to sit under. He begins to get sad. He gathers a bunch of thick sticks as numerous logs as he can discover and attempts to make a shelter. By the time he finishes stopping rain getting on him the time is 6pm and the island is dark. He thinks he is seeing moving figures but he thinks it’s an illusion because he is dehydrated. He knows a lot about dehydration since he is a doctor. Without having water every cell in your body begins to shrink and shrivel. Blood can not flow which leads to much less than sufficient oxygen obtainable for your muscles to keep working. Dehydration can commence within 5-6 hours of being with out water. Inside 24 hours, your body can be severely dehydrated. He remembers taking a lesson on survival at high school. But he in no way paid any attention he tries to keep in mind and get little bits of data 1 by 1. He begins searching in the dark for any stream of fresh water about the island, luckily he is lucky! As he’s scooping up hand fulls of water in his mouth he hears a voice behind him repeating joey, joey, joey, joey. The sound is like there are several people behind him whispering the same thing more than and more than once more in a low sharp quickly voice. He Sais to himself that it is okay it is just my body. Then he feels something touch him…. And now joeys fighting for survival and fighting for his life with demonic forces and supernatural events. Will joey survive this creepy island or will his luck. Run. Out. I’m 13 btw. Hope you like it!!!!!!!! Fairly please don’t steal my thought.
What must I call the island? and what should the title be? Any help is significantly appreciated.
Best answer:
Answer by Mimisor
You cant swap tickets, they have your names on it.
Add your own answer in the comments!
personally i think this wouldnt work out. it sounds like the psycological aspect of castaway combined with unrealistic situations. sharks? really? way too played out. why is he the only survivor? he crashed right near an island? he wasnt hurt at all? does desmond have a bigger part? if not, then i’d suggest thinking of a more realistic way to get him on the alternate plane. its a good start but you have a long way to go
good but not enough good thriller ,you can call the island “romeo first” the title you can put ” lost on the way”.
There are good ideas within this story. Unfortunately, it does not work as a whole. But, before you get upset, know and understand this is part of the creative writing process. Not every idea works out or turns out the exact way you want it.
The problems are this:
1. The beginning sounds like Castaway
2. You wait too long to introduce the paranormal
3. The plot is too complicated
4. It would be exceptionally difficult for a 13 year old to write from the perspective (or even limited perspective) of a 26 year old.
5. A doctor would know more about survival.
But, like I said, there are some good ideas in here that you can maybe use in your next story. For example:
1. Someone being stuck on an island. You seem to know a lot about survival. In fact, this seems to be your strong point. How about writing about a kid (or group of kids) who is (are) stuck on an island and have to wait for help?
2. The supernatural. You could easily use the supernatural characters you have created in another story.
3. The plane ticket and the stranger. Maybe you could write a story in two halves. One where a character accepts the ticket and one where they do not. The plane crashes and there are two possible outcomes.
Best of luck. Don’t give up just because this one did not work out.
That was very good. Better than anything I could of came up of.
With the names changed and different characters in it, it sounds like LOST, on that Island.and too much of nothing is in the story.and your sais, should be said.,
Rethink what you have said, and do it again, and the next time you will get better remarks. OK! Love you, Have a Happy New Year